Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – MAY 6 - 12, 2024
page two

TECHNOLOGY
  Flying Car Makes First Flight
With Passenger

“I only called Uber to go to 7-Eleven, but then we couldn't land because the parking lot was full — the driver had to divert us to Wienerschnitzel.”
 
LAW
FBI: Americans Over 60 Lost
$3.4 Billion to Scams in 2023

One-third to scammers posing as grandchildren, the rest to grandchildren gone wrong.
 
FACTOID
96% of All Books Published
Sell Less Than 1,000 Copies

Usually just one, purchased by the author.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
FBI: Significant Drop in Serious Crime in Major American Cities
Many families forced to choose between bullets and butter.
FEATURE
What percentage of Republicans believe it would be a good idea to let Donald Trump be a dictator for the first day of his second term?
   A )  12%  
   B )  15%  
   C )  20%  
   D )  75%  
Hint: really, what could he do in one day?
 
ELECTION 2024
Trump Won't Rule Out
Violence if He Loses

“Depends on my mood,” he adds.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
New AI Humanoid Robot Cooks, Cleans “Faster Than Man”
Already in talks with Food Network.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
 © Copyright 2024 Ironic Times